Merely Ten Years
Many things can change in a decade. Millennials grew up during the runtime of popular TV series, such as Friends, which lasted ten years. A decade ago, many of us probably couldn't comprehend how influential AI innovation would become. Ten years is by no means a short amount of time, so imagine for a moment how our perception of the world would change if ten years felt like it passed in an instant. How would we begin to feel if we outlived those around us generation after generation?
Emotional detachment is described as the inability or refusal to connect with other people emotionally. There is significant impact detachment has on the perception and experience of our memories. What otherwise might be a sad or fond memory, would be experienced as distant or accompanied by a feeling of numbness. Memories serve as proof of other peoples existence, to detach from our personal relationships can feel like rejecting those same existences; like we can't appreciate them while they are here.
This post contains spoilers for the anime Frieren: Beyond Journeys End.
Frieren: Beyond Journey's End conveys a strong message about taking people for granted, hugely attributed by the emotionally detached, elven protagonist, Frieren. The anime offers a heartwarming experience with captivating artwork and animation, uniquely blending together the present with the past to support the overarching theme. The story is told with a slower pacing, letting the tension gradually build up to deliver a heartfelt message that is impressionable and long lasting. In many subtle and obvious ways, I believe a lot of lessons can be learnt from Frieren: Beyond Journey's End.
For Frieren, ten years is a short time. She has lived for over a thousand years, surviving the fall of her tribe and outliving many of her companions including her mentor. To her, humans die frequently and their lives feel ephemeral. For the majority of her life, emotional detachment didn't pose a problem. It wasn't until the end of the heroes' journey, that she began to consider otherwise.
The theme of taking people for granted is woven throughout the series, beginning with Himmel's funeral and unfolding gradually over the course of the anime. As she adopts Fern as an apprentice and as she revisits sites of her past, there are subtle nods that point towards the overarching theme: her understanding of the preciousness of life is evolving.
The Death of Himmel the Hero
Merely ten years. That was the sentiment expressed by Frieren at the end of the heroes' journey. To her, ten years was only a small fraction of her lifetime. She couldn't understand how significant decades were to humankind. To Himmel, those ten years held his most precious memories. It was not until his death that Frieren felt the gravity of his existence—the weight of her loss. At Himmel's funeral eighty years later, Frieren realised that she knew nothing about Himmel despite their decade long journey together. She cried in frustration and in that moment, made it her goal to learn and better understand humankind.
Frieren’s greatest regret is not treating her time with Himmel with the same importance he did. To her, time had always been an endless resource, something she could return to whenever she wished. Himmel’s death teaches her the value of life through absence. For the first time, she is forced to experience time with the same urgency as humans.
As a result, Frieren begins visiting her remaining friends before they pass, no longer assuming there will always be another opportunity. She also spends less time lingering in each town, moving forward understanding that time is not endless for everybody. Himmel’s death becomes the turning point in her character, fundamentally reshaping her relationship with humanity. Through losing him, Frieren comes to understand the weight of her negligence, and that cherishing people means appreciating their presence while they are still alive.
Through her memories, Frieren learns that cherishing someone means knowing what's important to them. In the past she never understood why every small moment was incredibly important to Himmel. Himmel cherished every detour, side quest, and adventure they had on their decade long journey, believing that every lighthearted moment had significance. It was his philosophy that their journey should be remembered for the fun and silly moments, rather than those that are hard and painful.
In her memories, we view Himmel as a person who always helps and shows up when he is needed. He lived life presently, and understood he could make a difference now, not later. In Frieren's eyes, Himmel is not the a heroic symbol because he defeated the Demon King, it is by his kindness.
This understanding is important because it reframes what it truly means to live a meaningful life. Himmel’s way of cherishing others wasn’t found in achievement or legacy, but in attention. Himmel’s kindness and presence challenges Frieren’s former detachment, teaching her that appreciation is the care we offer in ordinary moments. In learning this, Frieren begins to understand not only Himmel’s life, but how she must now live alongside others.
When Student Becomes the Teacher
Fern lost her parents while she was very young, the loneliness driving her to near suicide. She is forever grateful to Heiter who adopted and encouraged her to keep living. When Heiter became sick, she felt extreme urgency to become a fully fledged mage. Fern learnt magic as a means to support herself after he died. To her, becoming an established mage was her way of repaying Heiter, a statement of 'I will be okay' for when he passes. Afterwards she became Frieren's apprentice, and while she may be the student, Fern teaches her many lessons of the human heart.
Unlike how Himmel's death taught Frieren about taking people for granted, Fern teaches her by being present daily. In many ways Fern teaches Frieren that to cherish somebody means commitment, this is reflected in the way Fern understands Frieren's many habits. Fern wakes her up every morning because she understands that Frieren loves to sleep in. Fern is patient with Frieren in her pursuit for acquiring weird spells. She understands that Frieren has a unique love for magic, and prevents her from wasting money on pointless trinkets. At first glance Frieren might seem like a major headache, but to Fern, she is her beloved teacher and assimilates Frieren's joy as her own.
Fern is a lesson that companionship comes with responsibility. She gets upset when she feels overlooked, she expects snacks and treats, and places great importance on monumental dates. Fern understands that time is limited. In Fern's eyes, every moment together is cherish-able, every birthday is important and negligence is a missed opportunity. Frieren starts to understand this during their travels. Though difficult, Frieren begin's to put thought into birthday presents, and researches dessert places they can go together. Learning about Fern and what matters to her is a testament to Frieren's growth as a character.
This dynamic is important because it helps Frieren understand the mistakes of her past. Frieren learns that to cherishing someone means to be present continuously. By remembering Himmel and living alongside Fern, Frieren learns that appreciation starts now, not when they are gone.
Frieren's Growth
Throughout the series, we see Frieren becoming less emotionally detached in her pursuit to understand humankind. Frieren begins to understand the importance of her journey with Himmel and the others, and by reminiscing, she starts holding those memories with higher regard. As she revisits old places, there are many ways we see her perspective change.
In episode two, Frieren and Fern visited a village that had a statue of Himmel. To breathe more life into the statue they decided to grow a bed of flowers around it. Reflecting on her time with Himmel she remembered about the blue-moon weed. The blue-moon weed is a flower that grew in Himmel's hometown, and is Himmel's favourite flower. He remarked that one day he wanted to show them to Frieren, but never got the chance to while he was alive. Frieren decided that it needed to be blue-moon weed. It is a small but considerate act that signifies the importance of Himmel's life to Frieren.
Frieren loves magic. She collects unusual trinkets, and various weird and trivial spells. While others don't understand why she collects such odd spells, we learn that she enjoys collecting them because Himmel had once praised her for them. To Fern, a spell to turn grapes sour is weird and pointless, but to Frieren, sour grapes were the favourite food of her dear friend Eisen the Warrior. Perhaps to Frieren, the pursuit of magic carries the memory of her former companion's with her.
At the end of the series, Fern's staff broke in a dungeon battle against Frieren's replica. The staff is an important possession to Fern because it was a gift from the late Heiter. She was deeply distraught, and upset by Frieren's suggestion at replacing the staff altogether. Recognising the hurt, Frieren searched for somebody to fix the staff.
In every experience, Frieren realises that cherishing someone means trying to understand what matters to them.
The Key Takeaway
Frieren's journey speaks a powerful message about taking people for granted, a message we can take into our own lives. Frieren's negligence mirrors how we sometimes act in our own lives. We don't neglect each other because we do not care, it is because we believe each other to be invariable. We don't realise the preciousness of every moment, and view every experience as repeatable.
The most important lesson is not about regret, but responsibility. We cannot control how long people stay in our lives, but we can control how present we are while they are here. Frieren’s growth shows us that meaning is found in attention, kindness, and the willingness to treat ordinary moments as significant. Cherishing people begins long before loss—it begins now, in how we choose to show up.
The End
Hello everybody, this concludes my very first blog post and I hope the read proved insightful and thought-provoking. I would love to know what your thoughts on the subject are, so if you have a spare moment, please do leave a comment. If you made it this far, I thank you so much for reading!
